An elegant celebration
Now living Southern California, with Californian husband Kamal, registered nurse Trishna returned to her hometown of Masterton for her wedding late last year. She shares the story of her dazzlingly beautiful wedding at Rose & Smith.
“I knew that wanted an elegant wedding from the get-go. Kamal and I were both living in San Francisco at the time, but luckily I had the support of my parents, who helped with a lot of the planning.
Our wedding was a Hindu ceremony. Over the two days before the big day, we held pre-wedding ceremonies and rituals – some carried out separately at our own homes.
The first morning we performed a Ganesh Puja at home. Performed by a priest, we pray to Lord Ganesha for blessings. After this at the Pithi ceremony, the ladies in my family (Mum, grandmothers and aunts) painted a turmeric mixture on my feet, arms and face. That same afternoon we held the Bridal Mendhi party where intricate henna designs are painted on the bride’s hands and feet, the initials of the groom are hidden in the design for him to find on the wedding day.
On the second day we held the Grah Shanti, this is another puja performed by a priest, to remove outside and astrological obstacles. But the evening is where the real fun begins with Sangeet night. Both the bride and groom’s families come together for a night of fun and dancing – it’s like a wedding reception. My siblings and cousins surprised us with two amazing dance performances.
Our wedding day was held at Rose & Smith at Tauherenikau Racecourse. It’s a beautiful building with the rustic charm that I was looking for. Also, we could accommodate 150 guests – this is small by Indian wedding standards. Our wedding planner Paula Bevege was amazing at providing suggestions for everything we needed. Our family and family friends knew where to get all the Indian-related items and a lot of them had things we could borrow for the ceremonies. That’s the amazing thing about our community – everyone pulls together to help out.
The wedding day is filled with special rituals. Traditionally, the bride wears red (although this can also vary by region and many brides choose other pastel colours) as this is an auspicious colour.
The mother of the bride welcomes the groom’s procession at the Mandap (wedding altar). Brothers of the bride hold up a large veil while the bride enters so that he can’t see her, although he will try to take a sneak peek. Usually, uncles of the bride escort her to the Mandap, but I had my dad escort me half-way. The bride’s mother and father place the bride’s hand in the hand of the groom, under the veil, entrusting her happiness to him from now on. The priest continues mantras and once this is completed the bride and groom are officially married and the veil is removed.
After this a piece of the bride’s and grooms’ outfit is tied together and they complete the Mangal Phera – four circles around a sacred fire representing Dharma, Artha, Kama and Moksha (four goals of human life). After the last circle whoever sits first is the “boss” in the marriage – it’s always a competition. The bride then touches seven betel nuts, representing seven sacred vows of marriage, assisted by the groom, both reciting the vows. The groom then puts red vermillion in the bride’s hair parting and ties the mangalsutra (necklace) around her neck, symbolising that the bride is now married.
Lastly the bride and groom feed each other sweets, a symbol of their first meal together as husband and wife.
Wedding Tips
Have a clear vision of what you want for your wedding.
Start planning at least 10-12 months in advance and book your venue early.
Definitely get a wedding planner/coordinator – it really helps to have someone, manage all of the coordination needed to achieve your wedding vision.
Get your family involved – it really helps take the stress away.
Have a guest itinerary so that they know where they need to be and when. This was helpful for us, with 150 guests, three hotels, and three venues.
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